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Let me begin by
saying that though me fiancé and I are not Pennsylvania residents, his daughter
and mother lived in Pennsylvania until March of 2001 because of that we filed
for visitation/partial custody in Montgomery County, Pa. The child is a
result of a 3 week relationship in 1998. At the time my Fiancé found out
the mother was pregnant, she denied that the child was his...the timing wouldn't
have been right. Fast forward to October 2000 when my fiancé was served
with a child support complaint. He went to court in NJ, our home state,
and requested a paternity test. The test came back in February 2001,
verifying that he was, in fact, the father. He contacted the Mother by
phone, requesting to see the child. At the same time we retained a layer
in Pa. to initiate a custody arrangement. He mailed her a letter stating
that the father wanted to exercise his visitation rights and to contact him ASAP
to discuss, or we would file in court for visitation. At the time, we
foolishly felt that the agreement could be drown up out of court, then when
signed, filed in Montgomery County to make it enforceable. When he spoke
to the Mother, she stated that she had just had another child, in fact she gave
birth 2 days before, and asked if the father would give her a couple weekend to
get situated, the call back. When he called her back, two weeks later, she
had disappeared. Again, we foolishly felt that she would turn up, but by
April, with still no word from her, we filed for a custody conference in
Montgomery County family court. We were told that we had to file in pa,
because Pa. was the child's home state (she live there her entire life), and the
mother had never changed her address. Needless to say, the mother did not
show up for court, and we obtained and order for her to return to Pa with the
child. The court left it up to us to locate and serve her. Let me
state again that this child was a result of a 3 week relationship, the father
had no idea where to contact her. She never changed her address and was
still collecting welfare in Montgomery County. In June of 2001, the father
was served with a restraining order form Eugene, Oregon. The order stated
the her orally threatened her (complete lie) and asked for 100% custody and that
the father be allowed no contact with the child. The order also granted
jurisdiction over custody/visitation to Oregon. We, of coarse asked that
Jurisdiction be given to Pa, as that was the home state in April when we filed.
We received notification today, that we lost...jurisdiction was awarded to
Oregon. We lost because there are no "present contacts in Pa."
If we lived in Pa it would be a different story, but we never did. We
weren't allowed to file in NJ, so where were we supposed to file. We are
thinking of appealing based on the fact that the mother never changed her
address with the post office or welfare. At the time we filed the initial
complaint she was still collecting welfare in Montgomery County, even though she
is claiming that she didn't live there at the time. Her benefits were cut
off May 1, 2001. The Judge also stated that we can't prove that she knew
about the custody complaint because she didn't pick up the registered mail, but
the letter sent general mail was never returned. She did admit receiving
the initial letter from out lawyer, but stated that it didn't contain a
"time Frame" for her to get back to him. He did not have any
contact with the child for the first 2 and a half years because he and SHE both,
did not think he was the father. She initially named someone else as the
father in Court. We want to appeal, for if the child remains in Oregon, we
will never see her. We cannot afford to go visit her, or fly out to get
her, and the mother is on welfare in Oregon, and cannot help with the expense.
It is also interesting that his child support is still being collected in
NJ and mailed to Pa, as she still has not given Oregon the proper information so
they can transfer the child support out there. This woman has manipulated
my fiancé, the welfare system and the court system. She has managed to
move out of state, across the country without and consideration for the father's
rights to see his child. She bypassed the laws that are supposed to
prevent her form moving unless she could show valid reason for doing so. She
knew that if she tried the case here, she would have to ask the Court's
permission to move, which she would have a hard time proving. We believe
this decision is completely unfair. So much for Pennsylvania's
"Fatherhood Initiative" that is supposed to help a father be involved
with his child. By the way, I contacted them three times, and they never
responded.
Well, that's the story. You can post this on your website. If you
know of anyone that could help us, please contact me.
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