Dear Mr.. Derbes,
My name is Brian Piaquadio,
I am writing to you with some questions about the Fatherhood Initiative in
Pennsylvania. As I have read this is a pilot program to help initiate a more
active role for fathers within their children's lives. As a NCP there are issues
that I do not see this plan addressing. I have been dealing with the issue of
trying to be a part of my child's life now for 12 yrs. The problems that face
our society today and the effects of children who grow up without fathers are
real and statistically confirmed. Unless we address all issues concerning
children without fathers this program is seen as nothing but another tool to
collect child support from NCP's. My questions have to do with what plans might
be considered in the future concerning CP's who do not allow visitation and who
repeatedly stand in defiance of court ordered visitation. Also in addressing the
family court system in Pennsylvania who refuses to enforce these orders. Out of
the millions of children without fathers actively in their lives, there is a
large number like myself who are being denied this contact by the Custodial
Parent.
Pennsylvania's viewpoint on child support and child custody/visitation is
that they are two separate subjects. This is interesting considering that the
statistics show that 90% of Fathers allowed to see their children on a regular
basis pay their support. The "Best Interests of the Child" philosophy is applied
only to the collection of support and not to the children's right to have access
to both parents and to grandparents. There is a saying that it takes a village
to raise a child. This also applies to extended family. Grandparents of NCP's
are told that their time is a portion of the NCP's visitation time. This is fine
as long as custodial parents are willing to allow such visitation.
My questions are as follows:
1. Is there any plan in the future to either take a look at or address the
issue of child custody/visitation and the family courts gender bias when it
comes to these issues ? (Over 80% of CP's are mothers)
2. Is there a plan for strengthening enforcement of visitation orders and to
truly punish those mothers who do not encourage or make available their children
to have loving relationships with the fathers? (If so will it be as active and
thorough as the enforcement of Fathers who are not paying support?) A healthy
Father-child relationship needs to be encouraged by Custodial Mothers for the
"Best Interest of the child"
3. Is there any plan to form a network of county offices or contacts to help
fathers who are seeking a more active role in their children's lives?
4. Is there any plan in place to encourage low-income fathers to seek out
technical training or education to better provide for their children. An example
would be what they are trying in Maryland: A low-income father who seeks
education or technical training to increase his income can be forgiven for a
portion of his arrears. Presently Pennsylvania punishes fathers who are seeking
to higher their education by refusing to lower their support in order for them
to go to school. This would be a win win situation for children fathers and
families. Thru better education and training fathers can provide steady support
and in increasing amounts. This program would be similar to the Veterans
Administrations Vocational Rehabilitation Plan.
The lack of fathers in their children's lives is an epidemic in this country
and around the world. This epidemic however must not put fathers solely to
blame. Gender bias family court systems and custodial parents should be held
equally accountable for the lack of involvement by today's fathers. Fathers
today feel like they have been abandoned by a system that views them merely as a
financial providers and not much else. A Fathers love, encouragement, moral
support, mentoring, and active participation cannot be replaced with a dollar
figure.
Mr. Derbes,
I have been remarried now for 10 yrs and have 4 children who live under my
roof. The joys and rewards of having those children in my life are immeasurable.
However, my heart is always empty for the child that I cannot see, not because I
am a bad father or a court order. But because of a Custodial mother who does not
value my involvement and a gender bias family court system that has left me
without a relationship with my son. He is now 12 yrs old and I have only been
able to see him twice in the last 10 yrs. I have and keep going back to court
but have yet been able to get the family court system to honor those visitation
orders, or frankly give a damn...
A Concerned Father
Brian Piaquadio
